Let me Just start by saying God has shown me so much love and grace this week. Being back in the D.R. Hasn’t come without challenges. It’s easy to get caught up in, not seeing visible change. Being a medical team, it’s easy to focus on just the medicine. I came into this hospital with the intent, that I wanted to help improve their outcomes. So many babies were dying, and I knew such simple education and resources could change that. I knew something as simple as blankets could help save these lives. I felt the Lords heart for that hospital and I knew he was asking me to be apart of the change. Granted I felt extremely unqualified and questioned the calling, and if he’s sure I’m the right person, many times but He has been so faithful in showing me the way step by step. I could see the nurses who were struggling in their faith, and I could see the ones who didn’t yet to know Jesus. I could see the hurt in the mothers eyes as they struggled with not knowing if their baby was going to live or die. I could see the potential, and the big picture for what God wanted to take place there. And I could see it would take a lot of time and dedication to get it to that. I knew it wasn’t going to be easy but, I knew with God is was possible. What I couldn’t see, was the struggle and the warfare I was going to face when I said Yes to God. Saying yes doesn’t mean that it’s going to be easy. Actually, most often it means it’s going to be extremely hard and require divine appointments that only He can set up. Saying yes means you are going to be attacked by the enemy, and let me just tell you friends, spiritual warfare is so REAL! But saying yes is also the best decision you will ever make. That Yes will take you places you never dreamed of going and saying yes draws you into a more intimate relationship with Jesus along the way because you realize how much you truly can not do this without Him and how you get to rely on him for your every need. This week when I got back to work the D.R. I was met with some of the warmest hugs and welcome backs. But when I saw a lot of what I taught them and they began implementing while I was there, was no longer being implemented I would be lying if I said I wasn’t discouraged and frustrated. I questioned if God sent the right person there this summer because maybe someone else could of done it better than me.
BUT GOD. yesterday as Amy and I were teaching resuscitation, I saw a Haitian Mom who had a baby in the NICU walking out crying. I stopped her to ask what was wrong and she sat back down to tell me that she was just 18 years old and also had a 1 year old little girl at home. She said her babies father lived in Haiti and she had a neighbor watching her daughter. She wanted to go back home to her daughter but, that meant she was going to leave her son in the NICU and not come back for him. She was overwhelmed by now having two babies to take care and being all alone.
In that moment I found myself sitting on the floor next to her sharing with her how she is not alone, nor has she ever been. But God promises to never leave her or forsake her, that when she is weak, He is strong. That He never asked her to do this life on her own, but instead she could rely on him for strength. That both her children were gifts and He hand picked her to be their mother for a reason.
But while Amy and I were sitting there with her, I realized that what was going on behind us was one of the nurses teaching what she had learned about resuscitation to another nurse. But as I found myself pouring into this women I realized that THIS. This. Right in that moment was why I was here. What was going on behind me was a plus. It was the “door into the hospital” but sharing Jesus and this women welcoming Jesus into her heart that day, THAT was the purpose in being there. The Lord was showing me how he needed me to shift my perspective. It’s not that I didn’t want to see this hospital save more babies (because trust me I do, with all my heart!) but sharing the gospel and leading people to Christ was why I was there. That what was going on behind us, the nurses learning life saving measures, that was a plus, but not the purpose. Because if they know how to save a life but they don’t know Jesus than it was all for nothing. It was like God was telling me, even IF the hospital never implements anything you teach them, even IF they never use a single blanket you give them, even IF…. that was never your purpose here anyway. If this was all for this mother right here, my purpose would be full-filled. He had opened up the doors into this hospital, not for medical purposes, but for the purpose of reaching those who may not be reached with the gospel otherwise. And that is worth it all!!! To see these sweet souls in heaven one Day will be the greatest gift I could ever receive. Just look at this picture of this sweet mom leaving the hospital today SMILING with her baby boy in her arms. Jesus so SO good.